I’m Sorry I Haven’t Got a Bagpipe

By:

The Friday competition is one of the many annual highlights of The Blowout. However there has often been the suggestion that it has an unfair bias towards those persons who own, or can actually play, a bagpipe. To redress this situation the June 2018 competition has been devised with two special classes that can be entered by more normal persons.

  • One Tune to The Tune of Another. (Open to bagpipers)

Each contestant has 3 minutes to attempt to play one tune to the tune of another on the bagpipes. (When this class was originally suggested to The President of The Bagpipe Society he exclaimed “But that’s impossible!”. This class gives every member of The Society a chance to prove him correct). (Judging for this class will be a combination of audience response, using slightly modified Cardiff Bransley (1957) rulings.)

  • New Piping Additions to The Uxbridge English Dictionary. (Open to pipers and non-bagpipers)

A good dictionary is essential, but meanings of words are constantly changing. Each contestant has an opportunity to share up to three new piping definitions they may have spotted recently. (Judging for this class will be exclusively by the Cardiff Bransley (1963) rulings. NB. Anyone attempting a new definition of, or even mentioning, the words Blowpipe or Bell End will be instantly disqualified from The Competition and may even be asked to leave The Blowout.)

  • Green Bagpipes. (Open to bagpipers)

Each contestant has 2 minutes to play a suitable tune on a set of green bagpipes. (Judging for this class will take into consideration suitability of repertoire, fingering and the shade and intensity of green.)

  • Bagpipers Book and Film Club. (Open to pipers and non-bagpipers)

Each contestant can suggest up to 3 book or film titles that are likely to be popular with bagpipers or their partners. (Judging for this class will be a combination of audience response, using the Alfredo Garcia rulings.)

Good luck everyone! Julian Goodacre

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